A little known secret that will change your life

Have you ever wondered what the secrets to achieving the success you desire are? Maybe you have watched those wonderful rags to riches stories, or attended a course or seminar? Perhaps you have read one of the numerous books on the topic, ‘How to change your life in thirty days,’ ‘Reinventing your life, or ‘Ten things you can do to change your life in ten days?’ While they all have great knowledge, insights and wisdom, why then, are so many people still looking for answers and remain stuck? I will share what I believe is a key secret that will help you change your results and ultimately, change your life.

To begin, let’s go back in time and transport ourselves to India. More than 2,500 year ago in India, Buddhism was founded by Siddhartha Gautama (“the Buddha”). One of the most well known quotes is:

“The mind is everything. What you think, you become.” Buddha

Your thoughts create your reality and sculpt the person you become

Yes, your thoughts shape your future and create your identity. When you have the same thoughts over time they become habits. Habits are run outside your conscious mind, in your subconscious mind, which means you are not aware of them. Furthermore, as you operate your life by habit most of the time, most of the time you aren’t aware of your thoughts. As you may not have filtered them in the beginning, many thoughts may not be relevant, helpful or true today.

Much of what we think and do today is shaped from past experiences. Our currents results are a reflection of our past choices. Moreover, if we want different results, we must make different choices. However, this is where most people fall down. The old patterns and memories habitually run in the background and they unintentionally sabotage their success. Furthermore as our beliefs, memories and habits are stored in our subconscious mind, until we become aware of them it is hard or impossible to change your life.

Your brain has to predict in advance the sensory input it receives and make sense of it

You have an incredibly powerful processing organ in your body, your brain. Your brain sorts and makes sense of the world and all the millions of sensory inputs all around. The objects you see, sounds you hear, flowers you smell, flavours you taste and the inner feelings of aches and pains and effects of an experience.

Your brain therefore has an an enormous and constantly changing puzzle to solve. To manage this puzzle, your brain creates concepts which allow us to make sense of the world. When are are kids we learn what a dog, cat or chair is. What chocolate tastes like and how floor polish is not for eating. Without these reference points everything would be a blur, like a bunch of pixels that make up a TV picture and we couldn’t possibly learn and grow.


Your brain has to sift through millions bit of information every second and sort it so we can attribute meaning to experiences
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Your memories are a reference point for new experiences

Now, here is where it gets interesting. Your brains job is to predict all this input before is arrives and fill in the missing details so you can make meaning out of the world. It sorts the input into concepts and stores them as memories. This is an important point because your memories become a reference point for new sensory inputs and experiences. Ultimately, the meaning you put on the experience, which then creates a foundation for future experiences

As Lisa Feldman Barrett, PhD, a distinguished University Professor in her book, ‘How Emotions are Made’ – The Secret Life of the Brain:

Because they are so vivid and immediate you experience the world as it is when you actually experience a world of your own construction. Much of what you experience as the outside world begins in your head

Let’s look at an example. A client came to see me as she was frustrated with her current income ceiling. She could not list or sell a house above a million dollars. As we talked, she admitted to feelings of not good enough and not worthy of great success. These beliefs were still being played out in her life today and the evidence supported this.

When you shift the meaning of an experience you can change your life.

In our coaching we explored different experiences and briefly delved back into her childhood. Here she recalled the frequent words of her father. “We are a poor working class family who have to work hard and will never be wealthy.” Other statements were added to this, such as, “You are from a poor family so you will never be rich.” Furthermore, any time she failed or felt she had failed, it made the belief stronger. It became established as a habitual thought and belief.

Luckily I helped her see things differently, release the old beliefs, establish new neural pathways and install a new belief to help her create a different future. Repeating and connecting with the belief consistently is an important key for creating new neural pathways. In a short time frame she sold a million dollar house and continues to sell houses worth over a million dollars. The new belief has now become a new normal. Ultimately this shift was the catalyst for new opportunities, experiences, bigger goals and achieving financial freedom faster.

So, the secret tip for you? Question your reality. Become curious, an essential ingredient of a high performing mindset. Ask yourself better questions and push your mind beyond its current thinking. Question all your thoughts and open up new pathways. With new pathways and expansion come possibilities and experiences which gives your brain new data to memorise and leverage off.

Here are six question to help you change your life:

  1. What would happen if this wasn’t true?
  2. Can I find two other meanings for this experience?
  3. If I didn’t feel/think like this, what could I think/ feel instead?
  4. And what action could I take if there were no limits?
  5. What is it I really want?
  6. Could I view this situation from another perspective?

To sum up, if you would like to get new or better results, if you have been trying to change with little success, the key is to adopt a mindset of curiosity. From here you can change your old memories, change the meaning of them and create new neural pathways, which eventually lead to new habits. Habits of thought, feeling and behaviour. Put all that together and you open up possibilities and opportunities that were once not there. The key to change your life and create a life by your design. Furthermore, to fulfil your potential and become your very best self!

About the Author

Mandy Napier is a Global High Performance Mindset Coach who is dedicated to supporting high achievers fulfil their potential and achieve extraordinary results professionally and personally. Transformations are the norm, and results guaranteed.

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